Meet Adults and Young People who are Deaf or Hard of Hearing

• Mavis​ – she shares thoughts about growing up as a young deaf woman 
• Demetra – she shares her thoughts about being deaf and living a full life 
• Denise– she writes about her experiences in private school in 5th grade 
• Irene – she tells us about the challenges she overcame to become a teacher of the deaf 
• Karen – she writes about being from a family where many members are deaf or hard of hearing 
• Kat– she tells us how her hearing family helped her feel comfortable in both the Deaf and hearing worlds - and she reminds us that parents should never stop communicating with their children 
• Mark – he is a school counselor, who tells us what it was like to grow up with a progressive hearing loss 
• Michelle– she tells us how she came to think of herself as hard-of-hearing, reminding us to be open to how people want to identify themselves 
• Pamela– she wrote this essay for her college application when she was a senior at a mainstream high school  ​

Mavis*

Mavis is a college student. She uses sign to communicate with hearing friends. 

On these pages she shares her thoughts about growing up as a young deaf woman.  

April 16, 2003 

This wise old mom of mine...I am happy about what she did for me during my childhood years (in the 1980's). As a teenager in the 1990's, I used to hate my mom for not forcing me to learn how to speak with my voice. And I would weep myself to sleep once or twice per week because of that. 

Now, as a young adult, I am no longer upset, frustrated, or mad about being unable to communicate by voice. I often socialize with non-signers by paper and pen as if they were my deaf peers. Sometimes I communicated by miming. I often felt like I am a free bird...esteeming myself to anyone by paper and pen as well as if I am signing (or speaking). 

True, it's hard sometimes, but it's not that hard when I am around people who don't think much of the slowness and labor in writing back to me. It may be because most of the people I hung around were advance educated ones (and I do prefer to be around those types of people anyway). On the other hand, it may be because I am in the adult world nearly all the time for the last four years. 

The parents of the today's young children who are deaf or hard of hearing were concerned that their children will get mad at them for either not learning how to speak or not learning how to sign later in life. This did happen both ways (as my peers who are DHH told me over the years). I remember my mom telling those parents "It's a typical teenage phase. I kept on telling myself that it will be over in a few years." I think she was right. After all, she did raise three teens--the oldest and deaf one and two younger hearing ones. 

I shall stop here for now. 

Mavis - Going to School 

October 7, 2003 

I am known as the energetic and curious Mavis, who was born profoundly deaf. I am currently a traditional college student planning to graduate in May 2004 with a double major degree: Biology-BA and Biomedical Physics-BA. Also, I am taking extracurricular math classes…enough to be minoring in math, but I didn't bother to make it official. I am planning to get a doctorate from a Biomedical Engineering graduate program or something close to it. I want to be "playing" all my life in a career I love, and I feel that where I am heading is the right direction. 

Going to a mainstream high school 

I attended a state school for the deaf for 16 of my first 18 years. But I did mainstream part-time at a local high school two miles away from my deaf school throughout high school. By graduation, I had completed 2/3 of all my high school courses at the mainstream school-and I was glad I did. The local high school was the only one in a town of 3,000 people and about 10,000 cows/cattle or so. Thus, this local high school was not like the academic high schools in bigger cities. However, I got plenty of challenge at that local high school, which I credit for my success at a mainstreaming state college in a city of 17 million. 

College was tough at first... 

When I first entered my college, I was grateful for what I experience back in 9th grade, the time when I took my first and only class at the local mainstreaming high school. The first college semester was another awakening for me. For 9 straight weeks out of 15, all I could remember was riding my bicycle full speed back and forth between classes and my dorm. 

At my dorm, all I could remember was that I was studying. I did lie down, but I studied lightly when I did so. None of this studying was "overdoing"; I barely memorized the materials for my exams. I had expected college to be harder, but not like THIS! 

Without my experience at a local high school providing all kinds of challenges I honestly didn't find at my deaf school; I probably won't have passed some of my classes with a C or above that first college semester. Worse, I probably would have been discouraged due to the college blow being unexpected. 

... but with extra work I'm proving myself 

Today, I am in the top 10% of my class and still improving. Also, I am now doing more than just learning the material for some classes. I put a lot of energy into going the extra mile to acquire in-depth understanding of subjects that I enjoy. 

Mavis - Getting Help in High School and College 

October 7, 2003 

Using interpreters in high school 

The reason why I stayed at my deaf school throughout high school was because my school had four interpreters, all good ones. (We had no real-time captioners.) Some other students who were deaf or hard of hearing (DHH) at my school attended my school just because they couldn't find interpreters for their hometown mainstream schools. Having a good interpreter for a full time mainstreaming of a student who was DHH was problematic in my region! 

Getting help in college 

As for college, I am currently attending a mainstream one with a big support program for students who are DHH. The program has a network of interpreters, notetakers, and real-time captioners (some of the service providers are college students themselves). 

Unlike most of my deaf peers, I sometimes used to want to go without any service provider in my chemistry, math, and physics courses. It depended on the professor's teaching style. I used to dislike having interpreters in these types of classes because I would often look down and work things out on my own-sort of like critical thinking. 

Another problem was that I sometimes had interpreters who didn't have enough background knowledge and they just confused me. Well, I later found myself needing service providers for my upper division chemistry, math, and physics classes. 

Fortunately, I am able to request a specific interpreter, who also tutors math and is very good at holding the important information when I look down at my notes and the textbook. I don't always get him, but often enough to keep me happy. I rarely use a notetaker in those three types of classes because I am able to write my own notes pretty well...as long as the interpreter was able to "hold" the important stuff I could otherwise miss when looking down. 

Using real-time captioning 

For my biology courses, I love to use the real-time captioners because I then can directly learn and read the biology vocabulary in the lectures. Also, I can look down and whatever I miss will still be on the screen for me to catch up on. I could use an interpreter, but the biology lectures have more words per minute and it would be painful if I was looking away. Also, if I used an interpreter, I would need to plant the biology vocabulary into my head on my own time in order to pass the exams. 

Since the Biology courses have more words per minute, I also use a volunteer notetaker from within the class because they are usually the ones with biology background. 

I also write my own notes, but they are often very messy due to the speed of the class. 

Working with volunteer notetakers 

When picking a volunteer notetaker at the beginning of the semester, I often don't know who may write more than what is on the board. Furthermore, I want notes that are as good as the ones I can take in my chemistry, math, and physics classes. Also, I know I need a good back up notetaker in case the one I pick happens to not show up once in a while (the service provider office would pay $50 to only one volunteer notetaker per class). So, what I do is to inform the professor, then walk up to the front and ask for candidates. Usually between 2 to 5 students come forward. I will try out all the candidates for a couple of days then pick the primary and the backup. For the backup one, I usually give him/her a gift at the end of the semester — not $50, but something. It depends on how often I have to use the back up one. 

For the general education courses, I use any interpreter and also request a notetaker from the service provider program. I sometimes write my own notes, sometimes I don't. These general education courses are normally easy and not of importance to me. 

I would rather save my energy for the courses I enjoy taking! 

Mavis - Communicating With Hearing People 

October 7, 2003 

Mom always pushed me to speak up for myself - any way I could 

I am the oldest of the three offspring in an entirely hearing family. Everybody in my family signs. Also, two of my relatives (both lived far away) did learn how to sign a bit. But my family never considered themselves as my interpreters, especially because my mom refused to let anyone to be in that role…no matter where we went. 

My mom took pains to make me write down what I wanted at a fast-food restaurant at a very early age-maybe 4 or 5 years old. Her system was to fingerspell the letters one by one as I wrote them down on a piece of a paper. She then sent me alone to the ordering counter to hand the paper to the cashier. This became a routine thing for me, and when I was able to spell just enough to get my words across, I did it without any complaints or question. I may have written poorly, with lots of misspelled words and poor grammar, but I could at least communicate on my own as a kid. When I didn't have anything to write with, I used mime-skillfully. These ways of communicating with non-signers are still my primary ones. 

One of my brothers, Kyle, used to feel a sense of responsibility for helping me communicate, even though he was three and half years younger than I. One day when I was 7, I was trying to tell some neighborhood teenage boys to stop killing ants. 

Kyle looked out from the living room window and said to mom, "I should go out there and interpret…" My mom stopped Kyle and told him, "Wait…let's watch." And there I was, showing them my sign already posted with "NOT KILL" and a picture of an ant. 

I then tried to kick them. Then I screamed at them. Seeing them still stomping the ants to death, I took off my shoes and threw the shoes at them. "Hmm," my mom told Kyle, 

"I don't think she needs any help." 

During my teenage years, my mom used to take me out shopping with her. Because she didn't want to be the interpreter, she would pretend she was deaf too, so everybody had to write things down for both of us. 

Mavis - Living in the Hearing and Deaf Worlds 

October 7, 2003 

I like being with hearing people... 

I like hearing people. Sometimes I love hearing people. Other deaf people sometimes will ask me if I am cutting myself from the deaf community. "No," I tell them, "only that the kind of things I like to do happen to be readily available in the hearing world." 

It is true. Every weekend, I ride my high-quality road racing bicycle at high speeds (sometimes as fast as 40 mph on the flats) with a bunch of men from my bicycle club. I am the only deaf person in that 500-member club. I also enjoy going to the shooting range to fire handguns and socialize. I never heard of any other deaf person who regularly goes to the shooting range. 

I could be going to the deaf night outs. I could be joining my college's deaf organizations. I could be going to the deaf dance events. But, I have no interest. To be honest, I found the deaf events downright boring. I only go if I have nothing better to do. Since I am always happily busy, I seldom go. 

...but deaf people are my people, too 

I, however, still need deaf people for social reasons. They are my people, and I just need to be with them from time to time. As a college student in the city of 17 million, it is not hard to get out and hang out with deaf people whenever I have the desire. 

But I knew the meaning of having at least a few deaf people in my life back in my high school days – especially when I was mainstreaming most of the time. 

My entire hearing family could sign fluently. But they were not enough. During the summer vacations, I would get so painfully lonely after about 3 to 4 weeks that I would drive all the way to my "deaf sister's" house. My "deaf sister" was 1 of the 2 known deaf teenagers within 50 miles from my home – her entire family was also deaf. This "deaf sister" of mine was completely the opposite of me. But we knew each other ever since we were in diapers. 

Here is an illustration of a typical visit: I would be sitting on the sofa (not my thing) with my "deaf sister" quietly watching junk on TV (not my thing) with her. From time to time, I would try to start a chat by saying something such as "What will happen if I put ink on my tongue?" 

We then quieted down until I could think of something else to say. It was a dull afternoon of just sitting and watching TV with my "deaf sister". I felt like every hour was about 2 hours of time wasted doing nothing. But I couldn't force myself to leave. I would just stay and stay until I finally crawled out to my car as late as 3 o'clock in the morning. 

I imagine that even if all hearing people on this earth could sign fluently, I would have an inner desire to be with people like myself from time to time...no matter who the deaf ones are. They are my people. And they will always be. ​

Irene*

*​The story below was originally contributed to a team that developed a website for families focused on "raising deaf kids" (See About Us). Minor edits may have been made. 

Irene Tunanidas, M. Ed., M.S. is a teacher of the deaf who writes her own newsletter, the Greek Deaf Communicator. She tells us about the challenges she overcame to become a teacher of the deaf. 

October 4, 2003 

Growing up with Two Languages 

My hearing loss was diagnosed at the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota in 1951 when I was 3 1/2 years old. I became deaf from a double dose of antibiotics. 

Learning the English language was a tedious task because I spoke Greek, my mother tongue, during the first 2 years of my life. My father, a native of Mytilini, Greece, and my American born mother, daughter of Greek immigrants, had no knowledge on Deaf resources at that time. They taught me to speak and write in English. Dad built a large blackboard for our daily lessons in reading, language and mathematics. The blackboard was in use for 20 years until I graduated from Gallaudet University. 

Going to School 

My early education began in the preschool program at the Youngstown Hearing and Speech Center, Youngstown, Ohio. I participated in the Oral Program for Children who are Deaf or Hard of Hearing at Adams School in Youngstown. In 1966, I graduated with honors from Woodrow Wilson High School, Youngstown, Ohio. 

In high school, I took part in various activities such as: Latin Club, National Honor Society, and the Teen Tymers Club. I volunteered in the school library and at the American Red Cross for 5 years until graduation. My adolescent life was like a roller coaster. I suffered from identity crisis, but I managed to survive in the regular program without the benefit of a notetaker or interpreter. My parents and preschool teacher were my supporters. Their faith in my abilities kept me going. 

Going to Gallaudet - and Seeing Sign Language for the First Time 

I had the option of enrolling in a hearing college, but I chose to attend Gallaudet University, the world's only liberal arts college for the deaf. Why? I was curious to see what Sign Language was like. Oh boy! I never saw so many hands fluttering in many places, and I was completely lost! It took me about 2 years to master my signing skills. 

College life was a rewarding experience for me because I learned that I was not the only one with an identity problem. After I received my Bachelor of Arts Degree in Art from Gallaudet University in 1970, I returned home in anticipation of a teaching position in the Deaf Program at a local public school. Public school officials were not willing to hire educators with disabilities. More rejections followed and I decided that the only way to prove my abilities was to volunteer in the Deaf Program at any Ohio school district. 

The Challenges of Looking for a Job 

One week before the start of a new school year in 1970, I walked into the special education supervisor's office in another school district and inquired about a volunteer position. He asked if I would be interested in a part time teaching position at the two high schools in Warren, Ohio. It took me 4 days to give my reply because I did not feel I was ready for a teaching assignment at the high school. I tutored three Deaf students in English, Civics and Government at Warren Harding High School and Western Reserve High School during the 1970-71 school year. This was my first teaching position with a valid temporary teaching certificate! 

Overcoming Obstacles to Get a Master's Degree 

I took Graduate Studies in Deaf Education at Kent State University in the summer of 1971. More obstacles followed. One prominent professor in the Audiology/Speech Department tried to scare me by saying that the college had a policy against admitting disabled students. He advised me to audit his speechreading class because he was not optimistic about my speechreading skills. (The professor was unaware that I had 8 years of speech/lip reading training!) I asked my advisor from the Deaf Education department for a copy of the university policy concerning admitting disabled students. She looked me in the eye and asked if I would stay in speechreading class. I took her word, and a friend of mine, a speech therapist from Shaker Heights, Ohio, advised me "to show my guts" by participating actively in speechreading class. The speechreading professor reluctantly accepted me in class. My parents filed a formal complaint with the National Association of the Deaf. We were advised that the NAD would file a lawsuit on my behalf if the Audiology Department at Kent State had gone to another level. 

However...we did not pursue with a lawsuit because I passed the course with flying colors. Finally, in August of 1972, I graduated with a Master's Degree in Deaf Education. 

My First Full-Time Job! 

I applied to five Ohio school districts for a full-time teaching position in the Deaf Program, only to get letters of rejection. This did not dim my hopes of getting a full-time teaching position in the Deaf Program. I completed my student teaching at an elementary school in Kent, Ohio and at Stambaugh Elementary School in Youngstown. I decided to try applying for a teaching position with the Youngstown Schools. I was rejected, but my former preschool teacher intervened by speaking to the school board about giving me a chance to teach in the Deaf Program for a year. I was hired on a limited contract, and I was overwhelmed with happiness. My first teaching position was at Stambaugh Elementary School in Youngstown, Ohio. Sixteen Deaf students were in my care; I taught Art, English, Social Studies in the primary and intermediate level. My competency skills were often questioned by my former colleagues and skeptical parents. I kept going with daily prayers and support from my family. 

In 1983, I took a sabbatical leave for two years to pursue another graduate degree in counseling at California State University, Sacramento. For the first time in my life, I had ASL interpreters in every counseling class. The college experience made me a better person. I learned to appreciate life more, and I slowly became a better listener. 

Doing What I Love 

After earning my second Master's in 1985, I returned to Youngstown to accept a teaching position in the Deaf Program at Woodrow Wilson High School, my alma mater. I suffered a personal setback when the Deaf Program phased out in 1999. I was transferred to the Regular Program where I taught American Sign Language to the hearing students in three district high schools. I enjoyed a new challenge with the hearing students but commuting to three high schools each day was very difficult for me. 

In January of 2003, I was offered a part time teaching position at Youngstown State University where I teach ASL and Deaf Studies in the Teacher Training Department at the College of Education. 

After 31 years with the Ohio Public Schools, I retired in June of 2003. I was looking forward to retirement until a phone call last August. The Special Education Director of Poland Local Schools offered me a part time teaching position at McKinley Elementary School during the 2003-04 school year. I am teaching a Deaf fifth grader Language, Reading and Writing and I also tutor him in other subjects he is mainstreamed for. At last, I am back to my first love, teaching the Deaf. I feel rejuvenated; my current assignment with a Deaf fifth grader brought back fond memories of my first tutoring assignment at the 2 high schools in 1970. ​

*​The story below was originally contributed to a team that developed a website for families focused on "raising deaf kids" (See About Us). Minor edits may have been made.​