~
"I don't think we discipline
our deaf child any differently. Perhaps when he was very
young he might have gotten away with something because
of lack of understanding of what we expected, but that
didn't last long."
~
"No. We expected honesty, self discipline and obedience
from both of our children."
~
"I try not to, but I catch myself being more lenient
at times with my child who has the hearing loss."
~
"The discipline is the same. I won't let my deaf
daughter go undisciplined for something that any other
child would need discipline. I care about her future.
And that involves making sure that she does not grow up
spoiled or thinking that she can behave in a way that
is socially unacceptable or do things that are wrong just
because she has a hearing loss. Deafness doesn't allow
a child or person to have an excuse to behave badly.'
~
"I think we may be easier on her, but I think that
is more because she is a girl, rather than because she
has a hearing loss."
~
"We worked really hard not to treat our hard of hearing
child differently. However, since she couldn't be yelled
at across the room, there were probably times when she
escaped some of the verbal "discipline" the
others got."
~
"I think more importantly is the child's personality
and how you can work with that to get what you want. I
have researched children's personalities and birth order
to help understand my child so that I can discipline appropriately.
It is important to make sure, though, that your child
understands the consequences of their actions."
~
"I would say that the answer to this question is
yes. Our hearing children, because they have so much more
vocabulary, can reason things out much better at a younger
age than a deaf child can. They hear, 'No, you're going
to get hurt if you do that,' or something similar to that,
many times a day and after awhile they know they'd better
not do that. With our deaf child, again, because he didn't
know the words, we had to make sure that we got the point
across in a way that he could understand. That included
using sign, mime, conveying in whatever way we could that
what he was doing was wrong and why. It takes extreme
patience and understanding in taking the time to explain."
~
"Because I sign with my child, it requires stopping
everything in order to have my hands free to sign. It
takes a lot of patience, but I think it has helped me
do a better job with both of my children."
~
"I'd like to think the answer is no, but I know there
have been times when I have not disciplined my daughter
for things I might have disciplined my hearing son for.
Usually the reason has been because I felt that she truly
did not understand what she did wrong, and in that situation
I felt it was more productive to teach her about why what
she did was wrong rather than to just punish her."
~
"Be extra patient, but don't let them use their impairment
as an excuse for bad behavior. Remember, it's possible
that they didn't understand the rules, so make sure things
are clear, but then follow through."
~
"Rather than just saying or signing 'NO!,' offer
an explanation to your child. Deaf children want more
than a command. Discipline is a great time to communicate,
so don't miss the opportunity."
~
"Develop a means of effective communication with
your hard of hearing child. Do not encourage him to use
the hearing loss as a crutch or excuse."
~
"Sometimes we have found that we have to act it out
in mime even to convey what we are trying to say to our
child. Show your child what he is doing, what it is doing
to the person he is hurting, and what the results are.
When you are sure he understands you, warn him that there
will be consequences if he does it again. He will get
frustrated if you say, 'No, No' all the time or discipline
him for something he did if he didn't understand your
reasoning behind it. Picture it - all he sees is your
mean face with your mouth moving. He might not even understand
why you are mad at him."
~
"Too many parents get hung up on the words deaf or
hard of hearing and forget that the child needs structure,
discipline, and responsibility."
~
"Expectations should be the same for deaf and hard
of hearing kids as they are for hearing kids. Lacking
discipline because of feeling sorry for the child with
the hearing loss will only hurt the child in the end,
possibly causing behavior problems and problems with peers."
~
"Don't feel guilty for disciplining your child. You
are doing the best for them by training them to be decent
human beings and giving them the best opportunity to grow
up and become what you would want them to be. Discipline
is a fundamental part of your love for them."
~
"Working so hard to hear and understand all the time
can be exhausting. Be tolerant when your hard of hearing
child has had a long day at school, because they have
had to work much harder than others just to get through
the day."
~
"You need to understand your child's personality
and work with that. Also, make sure you get down to their
level when speaking to them."
~
"Don't change the rules for your deaf or hard of
hearing child. They need the security of boundaries and
being treated like everyone else. It is also extremely
important for their siblings to see fair treatment."
