What
does the Future Hold? Expectations…Then
and Now
~"When
I first found out that my daughter had a profound hearing
loss, I had no idea what to expect concerning her future.
I do know that I did not suddenly have lower expectations
for her. What I saw was a child who was still the same funny,
cute, animated, loving child she was before we knew she
couldn't hear. As we began to learn more about her hearing
loss and what it might mean for her, I would sometimes find
myself worrying about limitations that might be imposed
upon her, not as much by the hearing loss, but by the hearing
world in general. I'd see how capable she was and worry
that others who did not know her the way we did would not
be able to see past the hearing loss and give her the chance
she deserved. When she was about 7-years-old, one of my
best friends was a lady who is deaf. She has a great husband,
a good job, and four hearing daughters. I was always bouncing
things off her and asking her for advice, usually pertaining
to something related to my child's deafness. One day I was
going on and on about worries that I had for my daughter's
future and asked for her advice on something. Her answer
was one that I have reminded myself of MANY times over the
years. She said, "You worry about things that I never
even thought about!!" That was a good lesson for me.
From that day on I tried to stop looking for problems and
concentrate on today.
It
took me some time to figure out that regardless of how much
I fretted over my daughter's future, she was going to choose
her own course, which is exactly the way it should be. The
dreams I might have had for her before she was born were
MY dreams, not hers. If those dreams have changed, it is
because she has gone a different direction than I would
have predicted, not because of her hearing loss."
~"When
I first found out that my daughter had a profound hearing
loss, I had no idea what to expect concerning her future.
I do know that I did not suddenly have lower expectations
for her. What I saw was a child who was still the same funny,
cute, animated, loving child she was before we knew she
couldn't hear. As we began to learn more about her hearing
loss and what it might mean for her, I would sometimes find
myself worrying about limitations that might be imposed
upon her, not as much by the hearing loss, but by the hearing
world in general. I'd see how capable she was and worry
that others who did not know her the way we did would not
be able to see past the hearing loss and give her the chance
she deserved. When she was about 7-years-old, one of my
best friends was a lady who is deaf. She has a great husband,
a good job, and four hearing daughters. I was always bouncing
things off her and asking her for advice, usually pertaining
to something related to my child's deafness. One day I was
going on and on about worries that I had for my daughter's
future and asked for her advice on something. Her answer
was one that I have reminded myself of MANY times over the
years. She said, "You worry about things that I never
even thought about!!" That was a good lesson for me.
From that day on I tried to stop looking for problems and
concentrate on today. 
It
took me some time to figure out that regardless of how much
I fretted over my daughter's future, she was going to choose
her own course, which is exactly the way it should be. The
dreams I might have had for her before she was born were
MY dreams, not hers. If those dreams have changed, it is
because she has gone a different direction than I would
have predicted, not because of her hearing loss."
