Coping
with the Diagnosis: Parent Views Accepting
The Diagnosis
Just
as individuals react differently to the news that their
child is deaf or hard-of-hearing, acceptance of the diagnosis
is also a very individual process.
~"I
find acceptance to be an ongoing thing. I have been able
to accept that my daughter is deaf and I think I did that
fairly soon after the diagnosis. It is something that
never goes away because some new challenge always pops
up to remind me all over again."
~"I
have a problem with the word acceptance. At what degree
can you accept that your child has limitation in communication
with other people."
~"After
a short period, I accepted the hearing loss pretty well.
During that time, I got every book on childhood hearing
loss that I could find in the library. My goal was not
that he will learn to read, but that he will not graduate
with a lower reading level. I think the deafness was easier
to accept for two reasons…we knew it was a very real
possibility, due to the meningitis and that he was so
sick that he almost did not survive. Given that, a deaf
child is no big deal."
~"At
first I would wake up in the morning, and then I would
suddenly remember. "Oh yeah, he's deaf, and I would
feel sick. I still remember that feeling, although it
did not last long."
An Ongoing Process Most parents describe acceptance
as an ongoing process, one that comes and goes over time.
When talking about acceptance, we are not just talking about
accepting the hearing loss itself. We are also talking about
the acceptance that life as we knew it has changed. Initially
it feels like everything has changed.
Over
time, we become educated and realize that the hearing loss
is merely a part of who our children are, not a definition
of who they are. We knew how to communicate with our child,
and suddenly that has all changed. We had a pretty good
idea of where they might attend school and dreamt of the
college they would attend and the career they might pursue.
Now we have no idea how to even go about educating a deaf
child or hard of hearing child, or even what options are
available, let alone what the future might hold for them.
The Good News
The good news is that we do find acceptance and begin to
adjust. Over time, dealing with a hearing loss just becomes
a part of our family. It is still a part of our lives, but
it is just that…a part of it. It is not the defining
factor in our relationship with our child. It becomes comfortable
and when we look at our child we no longer see the hearing
loss, we see the child.
Just
as individuals react differently to the news that their
child is deaf or hard-of-hearing, acceptance of the diagnosis
is also a very individual process. 
Over
time, we become educated and realize that the hearing loss
is merely a part of who our children are, not a definition
of who they are. We knew how to communicate with our child,
and suddenly that has all changed. We had a pretty good
idea of where they might attend school and dreamt of the
college they would attend and the career they might pursue.
Now we have no idea how to even go about educating a deaf
child or hard of hearing child, or even what options are
available, let alone what the future might hold for them.
